Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in osolonely's LiveJournal:

Thursday, June 3rd, 2004
3:43 pm	yeah ur prolly like o more stupid shit about chris. well ur wrong lol. today at school we got out yearbooks. and their pretty decent. i mean they surve there purpose right lol. yeah today was fun i actully had a very good day and it was just fun. i was hangin out wiht jsutin and eric and we were just being stupid lol and me and carrie were writing notes to each other the whole time in science. b/c ive seent he movie she played like 15 million times. so i kno all about it. but yeah i got some people to sign my year book and im gonna get a whole bunch more tomorrow. yup yup yup. and tonight im suppose to be spending the nihgt wiht holly she said she was goin to pick me up when her mom got out of work so ill see if she shows up. who knows!!! im really excited about that. i dont kno why. i guess its b/c i love holly lol. but other then that my day was awsome.and im really goin to miss this school year. im goin to miss my section believe it or not. i made some really good friends and have alot of memories that i wont ever forget. but summer is practically here baby!!!!! oh yeah well gtg ttyl bbyes (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, June 2nd, 2004
8:15 pm	ok i really am happy and satisfied with how things turned out with me and chris its jsut today i found myself cryin. i think b/c even tho its all over im goin to miss it all. im goin to miss all the memories and the fights and all the silly things that we did or said. hes just one of those people that i will always remember.b/c of the effect he had on me. all i kno is that i really loved him. even if its not true love. i loved him. and i believe he was my frist love. i dont kno if his feelings were as strong as mine. and personally i dont think they were. b/c he wasnt willing to work like i was.and even tho things are over i will still love him b/c thats jsut how i am. it wont be the same kind of love tho. it will be the kind that i'll never forget you.and i never will.!!!! (Comment on this)
6:37 pm	ok lets jsut say that for the frist time in a long time im actully satisfied for wat is goin on in my life. i mean there is no more "me and chris" and im ok with that. yeah can u believe it. lol im surprised to. but were just friends me and him function better when were friends ne way.carrie sort of got her heart a lil crushed. but i love her me and her have gotten so close these past few weeks. adn i totally have a new out look on her and i have respect for her. and im always gonna be there for her. b/c i know she would be there for me.this week is our last week of 8th grade. we have a total of 1 and 1/2 days left. im actully sad its ending.ive had so many memories this year. good and bad and i dont really regret ne one it. b/c i either learned from it or i had a lot of fun doin it. this year by far was one of the best. the people i met have changed my life and made me really happy. all my friends are really great adn im so glad i met all of them. i hope were friends for a long time. this year i;ve lost friends, but i made ones i kno i'll have for a long time.yes there have been many tears from me this year. but i think for the frist time ive had my first love. ive never felt for ne one before wat i felt for chris and yes im glad were friends. thats one thing im very satisfied with.yes he broke my heart and yes i cryed many times for just that one child but i love him i always will its jsut sort of changed into a sort of diffrent love. its sort of like ill always remember you sort of thing and i hope were friends nexted year so if and when i get a b/f i can rub it in his face lol nah j/k me and him are better as friends. and i like that. we have sort of a weird relationship but were always gonna have that special thing where we know things about one another and we once had that thing.my new personal quote is. " that thing that moment when u kiss someone and everything around u grows hazy and the only thing left is u and this person. and u wanna laught and you wanna cry b/c your so happy u found it and so scared it will go away all at the same time." i believe that to. but ne way this year has been very exciting and life lesson filled. me and my girl dev. have gotten very close she was the one i got drunk for the first with and jsutin parsen was the one i tryed one of my first ciggs. with and well so many ppl. and holly oh man so many memorie. she knows ill always be there for her. me adn her were having the same guy probs at the same time. thats when i think we clicked and became so close. holly i love u adn ever tho u diturb me sometimes never change.ill never forget when u called me at like 12 at night jsut to tell me about friday the 13th. thats where it all began. this summer will be great i hope everything works with u and " gary" lol me and carrie will get by dont worry ok.and ur beautiful i love u how u r. like ive said this year was great adn im never goin to forget it. its the best that it could be and im sad to see it coming to an end. i hope high school has as many great memories. im excited but scared at the same time and i wanna keep all my friends that i have now i love them all and i wanna keep them. yes all of them. lol well ill have more to talk about lata. well ttyl bbyes (Comment on this)
Thursday, May 27th, 2004
6:56 pm	hey wow this week had been a little strange. me and chris got into a really big fight. omg i was cryin. which is nothin new but what you gonna do. this weekend we were suppose to go to the beach but my nanny had to go to the hospital. so our plans changed. but now i dont kno wat im gonna do . maybe holly will be allowed to chill.hopefully. but who knos snce she harrassed someone lol J/k holly i kno u were framed. i believe u. but ne way things were goin really good wiht chris and then i messed things up but last firday i got 2 hugs from him i was so happy. words can not explain. saturday i wanted some more action from him but he wasnt delivering like i wanted him to. so nothing happened. then i went to the bay with devon. that was alot of fun and we both got real bad sunburn. mine was on my tummy. its not peeling and it grosses me out. ewwwww i dont like it. but wow theres only 5 days of school left im so excited for summer. on the last day of school me and dev are walking to her house from school. i cant wait. i hope me and chris get closer this summer. i really hope things work out wiht us. i mean ne way. i hope things work out for carrie with her chris man and holly wiht ur "gary" man lol haha thats so funny. " alex keep ur ass in ur pants" lol that was so funny. im really gonna miss this year. things will never be the same man im actully getting sad that the school is almost over. awwwwww and by the way i hate sarah riker me and her are no longer friends and it will remain that way till she stops being a bitch which will never happen so were never goin to be friends again and im cool wtih that. b/c i think shes a nasty slut and she should be shot in the foot lol or eaten by a shark. lol we need to find a tank holly lol. yeah yeah yeah. umm i dont know really wat else to say . im jsut having fun typing lol. im a retard like that lol. man i wish i got booty calls but the man i like is a pussy and doesnt understand a hint so i have to be the man and make the first move lol. im learnin lol.devon even told him wat i wanted but he didnt do ne thing how stupid id that. man i hope he never sees this lol he'll never talk to me again lol. so yeah this summer im goin to wyoming and depending on how my life is when i leave will determine weather i come back or not lol even tho i promised chris i wouldnt leave but he could very well have broken my heart again by then so who knows. i sure hope he doesnt. i really like him when hes being a nice man and stuff and hes not being stupid like he is when hes with his friends sometimes. that really annoys me i jsut cant stand it. but o well we all have our flaws i guess. rihgt now i should be studing for my science tests but i just dont feel like it. i dont want to do much of ne things right now. i want to talk to someone but no one is online and no ones prolly home. grr o well i guess im gonna leave. ill wirte back lata bbyes (Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 18th, 2004
9:05 pm	ok last time i had alot to say and i bet by now ive changed my mind about alot of it! like that i really really do like chris and we all know i want us to be more then friends!! and the really great thing is that today my friend justin told my friend holly that chris told him yesterday that he did "like" me hes jsut confused im not really sure wat hes confused about. but today he said i love u im not sure if he was being serious but i hope he was but then i got pissed cuz we were talkin then my damn comp froze and then he got off line! i was so pissed!! but hollys life is goin pretty good she was so happy today b/c sam was sort of in her pants lol!! she'll kill me if she reads this lol o well!!! today i got in losts of trouble b/c i'd rather go to devons then stay home and do chores!! sorry i didnt kno i wasnt suppose to have a life and one big reason i go down there is because i love devon she awsome and were becoming really good friends and chris lives like 3 houses down from her so me and him have been hanging out alot plus i get to chill with jsutin to b/c he lives down the road from them so its cool!! adn today i tryed to smoke lol i didnt do it right so nothin cool happened but i tryed im not so innocent ne more lol but dont let it get around ok !!!! lol jk (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Sunday, May 16th, 2004
8:38 pm	about loser boy mostly lol so this past week was ok i guess!! we went to hershey park and i rode on the same bus as chris and i sat in front of him it was cool. but i mean i still dont kno if he likes me or not i mean i so mant feelings goin on inside of me. one minute i kno were better as friends but then i jsut like love this kid and i jsut dont kno y!! its really bizarre. but i mean i just dont kno ne more.this weeekend i went campin and it sucked real bad i hate campin its so boring. but on saturday i came home for like a hour an hour and i was talkin to chris in the internet and he was like i want a g/f and i was like im single lol jk and he was like no ur not and i was like yeah i kno but i mean i want to believe he was hinting around to something but i dont kno. hes such a pussy and cares so damn much about wat his friends think and it really pisses me off. i mean get some gosh damn balls adn fuck wat they say. good lord!!!!!! i mean ive taken so much shit for him i mean he could at least tell them to go fuck a cow and give me a chance i mean honestly i've waited and i shouldnt b/c im a pussy and i retard but i mean i jsut cant get over this kid i mean i actully try to see him as much as possible and i mean i kno if we actully tryed to have a real relationship that we could makw it work if he was willing to put sone effort in like to not flirt with carrie at all!!!! i mean all i want is one more shot and if it doesnt work but i mean i follow the quote " if you let something and it comes back then its meant to be" well i let him go or in other words he let me go but he came back to me after a month i mean does that mean ne thing now? i hope it does i mean im so happy when im wiht him and i get pissed sometimes when he flirts wiht carrie and hes an ass when hes wiht his friends but i mean i cant have everything!!!!! i mean this sounds terrible but sometimes i jsut want to like make the first move b/c i kno he wont!!!! well i gtg ttyl bbyes (Comment on this)
Saturday, May 8th, 2004
2:20 pm	chillin hey thsi one will be short b/c im at devons right now and were haveing a prttey good time. and well we saw chris but he screamed something then we jsut kept walking and didnt thik ne thign of it. last night holly virginia and carrie all spent the night and we made carrie eat laxitive. we told her it was chocolate and she believed us it was so funny we kept asking if she had to shit it was so funny well gtg ttyl bbyes (Comment on this)
Thursday, May 6th, 2004
9:10 pm	its all good ok everything is actully going very well with me. i mean i finally came to an understanding wiht myself about chris and it feels great! my understanding is that me and him jsut make better friends. and thats jsut how it should stay. i mean we talk more and things arent so weird with us when we dont admitt that we like each other so yeah. ne way this weekend is goin to be so much fun. holly carrie and virginia are all goin to spend the night with me on friday and im so excited. like its goin to be a great chance for me to get to know virginia and i dont know jsut to hang out and have a good time. then on saturday im goin over to devs. and im really excited about that to. chris said that hes goin to make sure hes not around but i know secrectly he wants to be there and chill with ME lol jsut kidding lol i think he might have a thing for carrie ne way so it dont matter. i mean i dont things r goin really good for me right now so im jsut gonna wish on my lucky stars that they continue to do that and hopefully things will get better. like maybe i could actully meet a guy that likes me as much as i like him lol well ttyl (Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 4th, 2004
8:38 pm	life sucks im torn i really dont kno wat to believe or feel im just so lost. i dont understand why guys have to hide how they feel. i guess they feel like they have to keep you guessing which really pisses me off i cant stand it. i dony kno im told i should jsut be paticant. and see wat happens im also told that their prolly is hope after all but i still dont kno. i mean its jsut so weird. omg on sunday i called this guy and let it ring 3 times then i hung up. well he called me back adn was like why did u hang up and i said i got scared lol he was umm ok lol i felt so dumb but o well. i jsut dont understand why he wont jsut give me and him another shot i mean hes the one who hurt me and im more willing then he is. its jsut also screwed up and i feel like im in the middle of it. and plus i feel like im always competing with this one girl b/c he might like her but its so hard to tell but i still feel like im always losing to i mean i jsut dont understand wat she has i mean o well one of my many un answered questions but i kno that he dont like me so im jsut goin to give up now and forget about it and just not deal with it ne more ill jsut let him come to me if he ever does but i dont kno i just quit. (Comment on this)
Monday, May 3rd, 2004
5:57 pm	today sucked as usual.i mean it was just like ne other day i guess but i was hoping it would of been a little better. i guess u can say i was dissapointed. umm i hate school life and drama its like one big drama filled life at school. i dont understand why people are the way they are i really cant stand it. like i like this guy right but he always liek flirts with one of my friends. he always tells me he doesnt like her that he likes me ( i think) but i dont know its jsut stupid and i really dont want to deal with it. but now shes goin out with this one guy but i heard he mihgt dump her soon so that means shes on the market again which totally sucks for me but good for my other friend b/c she likes the guy this chick is goin out wiht but im afriad that the guy i like with leave me again yeah thats wat i said " again" for her but o dont kno he lies out of his ass ne way i dont kno if hes tellin the truth or not i mean i dont even kno wat people see in this girl. it really does amaze me. i mean i think im better lookin and i have a better personality and im funnier and how can an A36 beat a D i mean come on for guys that has to be a plus and plus shes really not that good lookin if u asked me but thats jsut my opinon. my nickname for is dog and the funny thins is, is that she barks back at me lol. well i guess ive nothin more to say so ill write back lata (Comment on this)